Boy Crazy

I had my first marriage at age 5. Yeah, I know that makes me sound like a mega slut, but it was actually quite the classy ceremony. I wore a nice white dress, and the groom came off the kickball field long enough to walk me down the aisle. It was that serious. Sadly, it ended in a divorce in 2nd grade. Knowing me it will be my longest marriage. (ha, I kid. maybe..)

After my first love (Kyle.. the dreamboat), I fell in love with two blonde boys with shaved heads (I think it was a phase I was going through) and one dark-haired boy who threw up peace signs in pictures with me. Grade school was a promiscuous time for me. Joking, I never even kissed any of them.

So where am I getting at with all of these tales from the playground? I wanted you to know that I have been scoping out men and their style since a very early age, so some might consider me to be an expert. I know I've touched on menswear in past posts, but today I'm dedicating the whole post to manly, sexy men. (Ok they are all scrawny as shit, but that's how I like my men, so back off.)

Holy ginger, this man knows how to dress.
The ultimate man bag. I need to get me one of these.
Teeny, tiny bow tie. Freaking presh.
Cuff those pants gentlemen. Thank me later for how much you're getting laid.
Man arm candy. Love it lots.
Daaang. That old man has great style. And a sick bike.
Shorts, clutch, loafers. Necessities.
This is the only acceptable form of cargo pants for men.
Everything is right about these two.
He's looking out the window wondering where I'm at. I'm right here!!

I just realized I probably should have titled this, "How to dress like a gay man". I guess for the straight guys reading (ha ha) just do all of these things minus the man clutch in picture 7. Now go get 'em tiger.

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